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Funny facebook status updates


  1. If you put a finger in your ear and scratch, it sounds like Pacman. 
  2. That amazing moment when you drop your phone but the headphones save its life.
  3. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
  4. If there are ice cream trucks in the summer, why are there no hot chocolate trucks in the winter?
  5. 3 Things you should never do after a breakup: 1.Listen to love songs. 2. Read old messages 3. Read their statuses, tweets or updates.
  6. I think I’m going to take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it…
  7. If you ever want to know what you look like to the world, don’t look in a mirror, have a child draw you.  
  8. A procrastinator’s work is never done.
  9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won’t live long enough to make them all yourself.
  10. It is impossible to act naturally right after someone tells you to act naturally.
  11. People tend to confuse bad decisions with bad luck.
  12. Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it’s a brighter day.
  13. Sometimes even though you’re having a good time, you can’t help but to stop and think about how much you miss the old times.
  14. What’s another word for thesaurus? 
  15. Does anyone else feel that the iPhone charger cord is just ‘this much’ too short?

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  1. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won’t live long enough to make them all yourself. That os a good idea.
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A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.” Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, “What would you like to discuss?” “Oh, I don’t know,” said the stranger. “How about nuclear power?” “OK,” said Little Johnny. “That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first.” “A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?” “Jeez,” said the stranger. “I have no idea.” “Well, then,” said Little Johnny, “How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don’t know shit?” “”””” Loco Domains has .site Domains names for only $2.99, .online for only $4.99, .com only $8.99. The